No One Can Make You Feel Inferior




“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” -Eleanor Roosevelt

I was thinking about this quote today, as I thought about a relationship I was in. I started off feeling important to this person, feeling like he valued me, he thought I was beautiful, and enjoyed spending time with me. From that point, it quickly declined to me feeling like he had no respect for me whatsoever, and from there got worse. At one point, I was explaining the story to a friend, said that one of his actions made me “feel about this big,” and I held up my thumb and finger to about an inch apart. “And then, this next thing he did, made me feel about this big,” and I closed that space to about half an inch.

It made me think back about this quote, and about how I gave this man permission to make me feel inferior. It made me think about who in my life I want to allow to make me feel inferior. And the answer is no one. Not one person in my life deserves the power to make me feel inferior. Now, I do give my close friends the permission to call me on something. If it was an error I made in them feeling hurt, then I do feel badly, and I'm okay with that. But I'm not good with feeling inferior. This to me means that someone is better than me. That they deserve better treatment, and more respect. The longer I live on this earth, the more I realize that we all have something to bring to the table. We all have a knowledge of something that the next person may not have, and wishes they did. We all deserve to feel good about ourselves and be treated with respect.

So the next question is, how do I not allow someone to make me FEEL inferior? It's easier said than done right? Well, I think the answer lies somewhere in knowing that I matter, that my feelings are important, and that I have them for a reason. The answer is working on myself, taking good care of myself, and loving myself, because no matter how much loved ones might want to do that for me, they can't. They can love me, but they can't take care of me, and they can't force me to love myself. If I choose not to do these things, I can get by, but I can't live my life to the fullest, because I will spend time with people who do not value me. I will put myself in situations that are not the best. I will stay in relationships that are not good for me, because I have not decided that I deserve better. I write this for you, in hopes that I am speaking to someone who has felt like I've felt. And if this is you, I ask you to please, start doing for yourself. Take care of you. Love you. You might say, well I don't have time for that, I'm so busy taking care of everybody else. I get that. But don't you want it to be the BEST version of you taking care of everybody else? And if there's no one to take care of you, and you aren't around, who will be there to take care of everybody else? Think about it. Now is your time. Be grateful for who you are, because there is nobody else like you on this planet, nor will there ever be. Embrace that. Love that.



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